Will the darkness she created claim the life she must live to be free or will her static inspiration become the dominant Noir she will need to save her from the violent death Goddess has planned?
EXCERPT
I want to believe my world didn’t end when the flame that warmed me most is gone. The second gun shot felt like it ricochet off my broken soul as I sat in the van chained like some destitute Calloway dipped prey. Every breath was a struggle once my mind tried to convince my heart he was truly gone. I hated that his position was out of my view.
That Psychopath shot him twice.
He couldn’t still be alive.
Why didn’t I just put the bag on quicker?
Now I am the reason he could be gone.
Moving slowly as I tried not to rattle my chains, I talked myself down off the ledge. Peering into the side mirrors, I breathed deeply embracing what was left of my future which now featured the picturesque vision of two bodies lying prone. The image of their demise sent a terrifying shock into what was left of my body.
There was my Sun, stoic and unmoving.
Waiting to hear any movement, I silently prayed for Cash. I was sorry that this is where my lie took him. I was sorry for Frankie and for my choices, but most of all, I was sorry I didn’t die the first time.
I could taste the static of Grey in between each vow of silence my heart continuously made trying to keep me in one piece. It felt like a comforting sea of Calloway wrapping its expensive hands around my neck, and I was feeding off the burn. Deep down, I was begging for the grip to get tighter, becoming more and more intoxicated by the thought of freedom.
That was the second I realized who I currently am isn’t the person I used to be.
In this moment, his love for me was truly about to get me killed.
If I was going to die right here, I would accept whatever came at me.
I fought back the tears that wanted to over take me by keeping them held deep inside as Cash covered moments kissed my mind into a tranquil state. He was what my soul will always crave.
Embracing the tortured thoughts of his demise, I could honestly say I knew what it was to be truly loved. He threw himself in front of her for me. He loved me beyond what our situations would allow. I adored him completely with a pure heart and every inch of my bruised soul. He became an addiction that I will never outgrow. He was apart of everything I will always be for lifetimes to come. I was sure we’d touch the sky and live intoxicated on each others drug since the day his silverish-blue eyes met mine. Our children would go on to live and tell the world of how their parents knew what it truly meant to unconditionally love each other.
He was a cause I could die for, but the Crowne in me would never let me die in vain. I had too much to live for, even if it meant dying trying.
Thinking about what Cash loved about me most, I smirked his trademark devious smile remembering when he challenged all that I am to make a daring choice to embrace all that he was as he stood behind the blue door.
I never have been a weak soul. I am stronger because I have survived Calloway Hell and lived to tell what death does to someone like me.
This was not my swan song moment.
I had come too far to allow another psychotic Calloway addict to end me.
When the silence went undisturbed, I uncovered my head as my hands began to tremble. Gathering enough nerve to save myself, I silently searched the bag the woman Cash called miniskirt had shoved in the compartment behind the driver’s seat.
Switching my view rapidly between the contents of the bag and the mirror view, I searched for anything that would unlock the chains I sat it.
Finding a bobby pin, I let out a small victory gasp as I began to bend it. Feeling a hand grab my shoulders while another hand covered my mouth, I jumped back while my adrenaline filled soul left my body.
“Alabama, it’s me,” Noah whispers, staring at me in shock while he removed the hood covering his head.
Sadie, the girl Cash once sent away, ducked behind Noah acting as a look out while he carefully got into the van.
“I’m gonna remove my hand. Don’t scream,” Noah instructs, staring straight into my eyes.
Nodding my head, Noah removes his hand and takes a key out of his wallet. When I released a surprised look towards him, Noah smirked at my expression while carefully removing my chain without making a sound.
“It’s a Calloway thing,” he whispers, glancing at the mirror when I scowl towards Sadie. “I am glad you are alive. Don’t be so concerned with Sadie. We will get to that later. Cash needs our help.”
I was never more grateful for the innocent nature of Noah Calloway.
“This is gonna hurt like Hell but, we need it. Don’t make a sound,” Noah adds, nodding to Sadie quickly.
Sadie quickly jumps into the van, shoving her fingertips into my open bullet wound and squeezed until my blood submerged her hand. Gripping my eyes shut tightly, I growled and sucked in gasps of air as Noah quickly placed his hand tightly over my mouth. Sadie removed her bloody hand and smothered it against her skin in the same places I was bleeding. Nodding to Noah while I closed my eyes and began to shake, he removed his hand and continued helping Sadie.
Not missing a beat, Sadie quickly pulls the bag in place over her head before allowing Noah to secure the chains to her wrists.
I was floored and unbelievably humbled. This woman who hated me for taking Cash from her a year ago is now putting herself in harm’s way to save my pathetic lie of a life.
If that doesn’t say Calloway dedication, I don’t know what would.
“Careful. You are bleeding a bit more now. Let me help you down,” Noah insists, lifting me off the van. “Can you walk?”
When I nod, Noah places his hand in mine and continues to look around before moving.
“Follow me,” he breathes, quickly moving from the side of the van towards a close row of tall hedges.
Following Noah into the bushes beside Cash’s rental place, he guarded me cautiously as if I would break. The adrenaline pumping in my veins made me feel invincible.
Did I really look that bad?
Placing his finger to his lips, Noah ducked me down beside him against the side of the house as he points to Skirtka standing up when she moves Cash off her. Rushing into the van, Skirtka slams the door before jumping into the driver’s seat. Seeing her pull on the chains that now held Sadie into place, Skirtka turns quickly to start the van and peel out of the driveway in the opposite direction with the rear doors swinging left to right.
“Thank you, Noah. Is he dead?” I whisper, following Noah into Cash’s home through the broken window.
When I begin to limp, Noah takes me into his arms.
“Who really knows who remains dead lately? I’d say you’ve lived to tell the tale. I don’t know what is going on exactly, just as I didn’t know you’d be the one I was saving. I do know Cash needs you to survive. I am glad you are alive,” he replies, carrying me into the bathroom. “You’re my favorite.”
Glancing at Noah in that moment, I was certainly grateful to be his favorite.
“I cherish you as well, Noah. Thank you for rescuing me, but what about Sadie? We can’t just leave her with that Psycho,” I say, placing my hand over the wound Sadie and her greedy fingers helped herself to in order to apply pressure.
Setting me down gently, Noah reached under the back of the sink to retrieve a loaded glock 1911.
“I’m gonna make sure the coast is clear and get to Cash. Don’t leave. There should be a first aid kit in the cabinet there. Cash always stashes his guns and medical kits when he enters a place to stay. That crazy lady used to be a Doctor. Isn’t that insane? She’s the one who restocks his kits. Believe it or not, she helped put Cash back together a few times, so there should be something to deal with major wounds and stuff. Least that’s what I heard,” he insists, checking the chamber of the gun.
“I can’t let you go alone,” I manage, feeling the emotions surge through me.
My eyes filled with tears as I turned my face from view. I had gotten far enough without Calloway filled tears. I didn’t need the purest Calloway seeing my weak moment.
“I can handle it. I’m a Calloway,” Noah advised, squeezing my shoulder in a gesture of concern.
“So am I as my luck would have it,” I counter, trying to stand up.
“You are hurt. Stay here,” he growls, walking quickly out of the room.
There was something about those Calloway boys. No matter what they were up against, they remained confident in their stance to the last minute.
Taking in the appearance of Cash’s bathroom, I couldn’t help but wonder who has been in this place. Who was holding him when my weakened arms no longer did? Who tried to love him past the pain that burned him from beyond my grave? Who has he shared his space with?
I know he couldn’t have been alone here.
Calloways don’t do alone.
Even Meryl had her side flings.
There had to be a group of thoroughly roughed up Submissives who remember every detail his smooth skin had to offer. I couldn’t help the anger that was churning in my stomach. Closing my eyes, I saw a vision of another woman’s hands caressing Cash’s golden torso in each place my lips had once blessed. Each inch of skin they touched made me want to burn each one alive for even having the audacity to touch him.
I now understood how he felt.
He was always mine even when he wasn’t.
They all needed to know that. They were just apart of his false illusion to recreate the ghost of me.
Cash belonged to me. He was mine completely.
That was my false illusion.
No man can control fire.
